There is a very simple reason why there are countless songs and stories about unrequited love. In 1960, Everly Brothers recorded a song that captured the essence on love in two simple words- love hurts. When that love is not reciprocated, it hurts even worse. But even though falling in love with someone who does not share your emotions might seem bleak, it still is not as bad as it seems. And here’s why.
You learn to handle rejections.
Let’s face it- getting rejected by someone can be devastating. You might feel as if you are not worthy of anything because this one person did not reciprocate your feelings. But life itself is full of rejections- and things seldom go as planned. So even though at first it hurts, you will eventually come to terms with the fact that not everyone will love you, and that is okay. Something better will come find you in time.
You are forced to be a better person.
The most common way to get over an unrequited love is to dive into hobbies and activities. So you will spend a lot of time reading, writing, listening to music and watching movies. You will spend more time with the people who do value you, and you will actively try to find new hobbies to keep yourself distracted. All of these cumulatively make you a better person. At the very least, it helps you see how much better you can be as a person.
Unrequited love makes you more cautious
No one likes hurting. No one likes feeling inadequate. So every time you get rejected by someone you fell in love with, you become a little more cautious so that you do not have to go through the same pain again. And in a way this defense mechanism is good, because you learn to distinguish between people who are worth your time, and people who are not.
You get more comfortable in your own skin
As sad it might sound, you are stuck with yourself. Wherever you go, whatever you do, you will always have to take yourself with you. And so it is extremely important to know who you are and be comfortable with that. We are not just talking about your body, or personality- we are talking about the whole package. So what someone didn’t feel the same way about you as you did for them? You are what you are, and that is enough. Let enough time pass by, and you will start seeing the truth yourself.
Eventually, you become more confident.
Yes, it sounds very counter-intuitive. Someone rejected you- this realization does not work wonders for your self-esteem. But if you ride it out, you will know what you can survive, and that gives you a sense of self that no one can take away from you. Remember, a wise man once said- “You are very powerful, provided you know how powerful you are.” Do not ever forget that.